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Actually, what I want is to sample the goddamn dip without being hit on.
Me: Can I try the jalapeno hummus?
Guy working at the farmer's market: A pretty girl like you can have anything she wants.
Me: [silent eyeroll] [mouth full of hummus]
Guy: I'm off work at 7:30.
Me: So you're saying I have to make a decision about this hummus at some point in the next hour?
"And to the extent that I am still a quasi-nationalist, this is the portion of the tradition that I cling strongest to: There’s nothing “white” about reading Rousseau or Tocqueville or visiting Paris. This isn’t getting above your raising. It’s burning down the Big House, the caveat being that you can bring some of this back and flip it to relate to the nature of your people. And you always can. Because your people are human."
"When Dostoevsky met Dickens in 1862 — a meeting that is hard to imagine — Dickens explained that there were two people inside him, ‘one who feels as he ought to feel and one who feels the opposite.’ […] Out of these two people he constructed his universe of characters, good and evil. Dostoevsky’s comment is laconic and ambiguous. ‘Only two people?’ he asked."
by

Verlyn Klinkenborg, The Whirling Sound of Planet Dickens (via curbsidequo)

Haha, cha’mon, Dickens! Get real.

30 Great Nonfiction Writers

tetw:

(links to over 500 great articles and essays)

We’ve scoured the internet to bring you the very best of our favourite authors. Click through for great article and essays by:

Mark Bowden, Po Bronson, Michael Chabon, Tom Chiarella, Jared Diamond, Joan Didion, Michael Finkel, David Foster Wallace, Devin Friedman, Atul Gawande, Elizabeth Gilbert, Malcolm Gladwell, Paul Graham, Mark Jacobson, Tom Junod, Walter Kirn, Chuck Klosterman, William Langewiesche, Jeanne Marie Laskas, Michael Lewis, Susan Orlean, Michael Paterniti, Venkat Rao, David Sedaris, Zadie Smith, John J. Sullivan, Matt Taibbi, Hunter S. Thompson, Gary Wolf, Tom Wolfe, Gene Weingarten, and Lindy West.

That thing when you should get to bed early because tomorrow is the first non-stop day of the next few non-stop days… but look at this. Look.

Roxane Gay is Spelled With One "N": Shut Up About Writer Ladies And Babies

roxanegay:

On a fury scale from 1-10, I’d give the bizarre literary media conversation this week about the optimal number of children to writing success ratio for women writers a 25. WTF? Do you even hear yourselves, people starting these conversations? Do you? No one ever worries about male writers and…

Preach.

#hurryupwithmydamncroissants

Junip.

Junip.

duhdoydorothy:

Louis CK as Abraham Lincoln in SNL Skit (by Thomas Woeller)

“i don’t have any black friends”

- abe lincoln

Favorite SNL sketch of the season, hands down.

Stevie Nicks, the Fairy Godmother of Rock

“People say, ‘But you’re alone.’ But I don’t feel alone. I feel very un-alone. I feel very sparkly and excited about everything. I know women who are going, like, ‘I don’t want to grow old alone.’ And I’m like, ‘See, that doesn’t scare me.’ Because I’ll never be alone. I’ll always be surrounded by people. I’m like the crystal ball and these are all the rings of Saturn around me.”

“My generation fought very hard for feminism, and we fought very hard to not be labeled as you had to have a husband or you had to be in a relationship, or you were somehow not a cool chick,” she says. “And now I’m seeing that start to come around again, where people say to you, ‘Well, what do you mean you don’t have a boyfriend? You don’t want to have one? You don’t want to be married?’ And you’re like, ‘Well, no, I don’t, actually. I’m fine.’ And they find a lot of reasons why you’re not fine. But it just seems to be coming back. Being able to take care of myself is something that my mom really instilled in me,” she says. “I can remember her always saying, ‘If nothing else, I will teach you to be independent.’ ”

I can’t with how much I love this woman. 

"Being born a woman is an awful tragedy. Yes, my consuming desire to mingle with road crews, sailors and soldiers, bar room regulars—to be a part of a scene, anonymous, listening, recording —all is spoiled by the fact that I am a girl, a female always in danger of assault and battery. My consuming interest in men and their lives is often misconstrued as a desire to seduce them, or as an invitation to intimacy. Yet, God, I want to talk to everybody I can as deeply as I can. I want to be able to sleep in an open field, to travel west, to walk freely at night."
by

Sylvia Plath


That this is totally applicable over a half a century later speaks to both Plath’s razor-sharp insight, and to a lack of real change. Yes, we’ve made headway since the ’50s, but the fact that the points made here in this quote — the crux of the argument, really — sit openly unmoved is pretty disheartening. And gross. And sad.

(Source: raccoonwounds)

I’ll take that a cappella Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks, every time.

Summrrr: Bowie, Vandross, dancin’ in the street. Rinse and repeat.

"I like knowing that my friends are so professionally supportive that when they get a promotion, it’s like a boost for my résumé, too, because we share a network and don’t compete for contacts. Also, it’s just plain tough out there — for all the aforementioned reasons about the economy and the dating scene and body-image pressures. I want the strongest, happiest, smartest women in my corner, pushing me to negotiate for more money, telling me to drop men who make me feel bad about myself, and responding to my outfit selfies from a place of love and stylishness, not competition and body-snarking."
by

Ann, talkin’ besties and lady swag solidarity.

Shinetheoryshinetheoryshinetheoryshinetheoryshinetheoryshinetheory.

ISSA RAE: OWN YOUR AWKWARD

Issa: I don’t think that executives right now, and the people in charge, think that people of color, black people especially, are relate-able. They’re not mainstream enough. I think that ad dollars are important, and people are scared in a way, too.

Amanda: But how is that possible to think that people of color are not relate-able? It’s inconceivable.


4 things, off the bat:

1. This perception of Relate-ablilty: White > Black is something that needs to be discussed, all the time.

2. I wish [so hard] that ABG had been around when I was high schoolin’. It would’ve meant everything to an awkward Haitian-American kid, nicknamed “Oreo,” growin’ up in Jamaica, Queens.

3. Those earrings.

4. Issa and I live by the same sp rule: Chair is best.